The Jack Harding Experience: Embodiment of Passion Pt. 1
I know you're all thinking, who is Jack Harding, really?
What does he do? Where does he live? Is he single? What does he shoot with?
More importantly, does he like Country music or K-Pop more?
No, seriously, don't fret, that was my first thought, too.
Before, during and after: "Who is this guy and why am I giving him my money?
Also, who listens to K-Pop?"
We will get through this together, just hold tight.
Tip #1: When stepping through a ticket gate at the Charring Cross Train Station in Glasgow, it is best to push your luggage ahead instead of pulling behind, to prevent getting stuck and missing your train.
I arrived at the Old Bridge Inn in Newbridge, Scotland, with an excessive amount of luggage and the serious urge to turn around and hightail it out of there, avoiding any other embarrassment I could possibly inspire for the day.
Sweaty palms, disheveled, disoriented, and a general state of "What the f*** am I doing?"
I can only imagine what I looked like to the other eleven people sitting at the table, staring up at me.
"You must be Emily! Your luggage was stuck in the gate, right?" There it is, I thought. "Yeah, but the comical experience merely added to the adventure," I replied. Enter Cliché : "Travel is about the adventure."
There were four empty chairs at the far-end of the table; Naturally, I thought, I'll choose the farthest possible chair from any other person, as I needed some serious space from this situation. "Who are these lunatics?"
Tip #2: Sarcasm is often seen as an offensive form of communication, unless you're in the UK.
...Weird, in a good way.
Every good British Comedy involves the character who is weird (in a good way), quite fit, a wee bit awkward, with a sharp wit, a belly full of fire, and an eating disorder.
Are we all here to hear my pitch for a new age British Comedy? Perhaps.
You have come this far, might as well stay.
How is this related to Jack Harding? I'll let you decide that for yourselves.
There were four ride options. Cheryl and I were the stragglers left behind; Last to arrive, last to pick our cameras, last to walk outside...
Okay, you caught me. I lied.
I was the last one out, primarily due to the fact that I had fifteen bags (four) and hid the largest suitcase in the closet, which was quite heavy and already had made its debut (see Tip #1).
Chivalry is not dead.
With a sarcastic comment for the decade, Jack Harding took pity on my current life situation and grabbed my suitcase for me, as we headed outside to meet up with the rest of the group.
"Here, let me help. I'll take the suitcase, you can take the bag."
"I have got it, thanks. #IDoCrossfit, " I exclaimed. (Yes, I actually said the word hashtag and yes, I understand how much that statement made me look like a complete wanker. I hope you can forgive me.)
Jack replied, "I did Crossfit once. It was my first and last class."
"Not the first time I've heard that. I did pilates once. That s*** burns! And I don't get it. How and why are you doing that with your body? If I had abs, they would be on fire.. I wonder what it's like to have abs.. Probably better off without them, " I exclaimed.
You are probably wondering if this is exactly how every situation turned out?
The short answer is yes, absolutely; Slower than the highest viscosity variety of Black Strap Molasses.
(Edit: There may actually only be one variety, and I am not so sure of the viscosity..)
Everyone shuffled into their respective choice of Land Rover (or Jaguar) and we were on our way to Aberdeenshire, the land of castles!
STAY TUNED FOR PART 2!